


Discretion

by EmeraldOcean



Series: Hunters and Heroes [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Blow Jobs, Bottom Bucky, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Dirty Talk, Hand Jobs, Light Angst, M/M, Porn with Feelings, Rimming, Secret Relationship, Smut, Top Steve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-23
Updated: 2016-07-23
Packaged: 2018-07-26 04:12:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7559626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldOcean/pseuds/EmeraldOcean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve is struggling with his feelings for both Tony and Bucky. It doesn't help (or maybe it helps too much?) that Bucky tries to reignite those feelings by reminding Steve of a night that they spent together during the war. </p>
<p>[Takes place after "The Mistakes Aren't Just French Anymore." You don't absolutely have to read that first (this can work as a stand-alone), but it may help to get some context]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Discretion

**Author's Note:**

> The action takes place during Captain America: Civil War. (After the big Avengers fight scene when Steve and Bucky steal the quinjet) 
> 
> This is really just a little background about Steve and Bucky's relationship. The sequel is still coming up and will take place after Civil War. 
> 
> I've tagged for multiple relationships because of this story's place in the series, but the explicit content is only between Steve and Bucky - actually, Steve and Bucky are really the only characters in this story at all. All of the others are just mentioned.

Steve hates this. He hates the situation that he finds himself in and he hates himself for feeling the way that he feels – about Tony, about Bucky, about everything that’s happened since the damned Sokovia Accords were first mentioned. The doubt and the fear that has been a constant companion to Steve ever since that day is roiling around in his gut like angry serpents, threatening to rise up and choke him at any moment. 

Steve is flying the quinjet but his mind is mostly on other things. It’s a good thing that the autopilot on this vehicle really lives up to the name. He can’t stop thinking about Tony. He’s used to fighting with the man, it’s just what they do… what they’ve always done. 

But ever since the Winchesters and the demon, those fights have usually ended up with Steve bending Tony over the nearest available surface and fucking him into submission until they’ve worked out their differences. But now things have changed. Bucky and the Accords just aren’t conflicts that can be solved with heated sex. 

Honestly though, Steve hasn’t even tried. Tony’s usual brattiness and snark have been completely absent, his dark eyes so sad and serious where they had once been lively and teasing. And now the fighting is real. They are hurting each other, not only physically, but emotionally as well. They used to spend nights mapping out each other’s bodies with hands and mouths, apologizing and reassuring one another that no matter their quarrels, they were there for each other, both as friends and as lovers. But now, their nights are spent as far away from each other as they can be, they’re enemies for all intents and purposes, and it’s killing Steve.

He risks a glance over at Bucky who’s sitting next to him. His friend is already looking back at him, a mixture of concern and affection expressed in his handsome features. He turns back to the windshield and the controls, hoping that Bucky won’t try to make him talk about what he’s feeling. Steve has been avoiding having a serious one-on-one conversation with the man ever since he found him again. 

It’s not that he doesn’t want to talk to him about his feelings, not really. It’s just that he’s not even completely sure what his feelings are right now. Steve’s pretty sure that he loves Tony, even if he’s never actually come out and said it. But with everything the way it is now, he has no idea where they stand. If Tony will ever be able to forgive him for what he knows the man sees as an act of betrayal, or if it’s completely over and Steve will never again feel Tony’s skin against his own or hear how much he’s wanted by the other man. 

And then there’s Bucky. Bucky, who he’s loved almost all his life. Steve had thought him dead, and then he’d found out that he was alive only to learn that he had been brainwashed and forced to be a deadly assassin who couldn’t even remember his own name, much less Steve. 

But now he’s back, and he’s Bucky again. Those same grey-blue eyes and smoldering look, capable of looking directly into Steve’s very soul just as well now as he ever did before… those eyes that he can now feel burning into the side of his head. Steve peeks a look from the corner of his eye when he senses movement, and then Bucky’s standing behind him, placing his hands (both metal and flesh) on Steve’s shoulders and massaging firmly like he used to all those years ago. 

“You know, you still get those little lines between your eyebrows when you’re thinking too hard about something.” Steve closes his eyes and relaxes his face along with his shoulders as Bucky continues his ministrations. 

“You remember that, do you?” Steve tries to sound light-hearted, though he’s feeling anything but. The feel of Bucky’s touch, gentle this time instead of the harsh beatings that he’s come to expect from the Winter Soldier, is making his pulse race with the anticipation of remembered actions. So many times in the past has that touch been the prelude to passion, and Steve is having a hard time willing away his burgeoning arousal. 

Bucky’s next words are spoken softly, directly into Steve’s ear as he bends down close. “I’ve been remembering a lot of things lately.” Steve shivers slightly at the feel of warm breath on his neck and Bucky’s thumb stroking down the side of his cheek. He cradles Steve’s face in one hand and gently pushes it to the side so that their eyes meet, their faces only a couple of inches apart. “I remember you, Steve… I remember us…” Bucky’s gaze drifts down to Steve’s lips and he knows that Bucky is going to kiss him. What he doesn’t know is if he truly wants that, if he’s even ready to find out. 

“Bucky, I…” Steve pulls Bucky’s hand away from his face and turns toward the console, making sure that the autopilot is completely in control before standing up and facing his friend. “… I can’t.” He walks away from the cockpit just to put some distance between them. He can feel the anticipatory heat bloom in his chest and he honestly doesn’t know how much resolve he’ll be able to muster if Bucky is persistent. 

Bucky follows him, coming up to stand behind Steve. He snakes his arms around Steve’s waist and pulls Steve back against his chest to nose at the back of his neck. “Why not, gorgeous?” The familiar pet name makes Steve a bit weak in the knees and he slumps back into Bucky’s hold, resting his head back on Bucky’s shoulder. “I know you can’t be serious about that blonde you were kissing. And we both know that that little act wasn’t for you, wasn’t really for her either… was it?” 

Steve feels himself blush because Bucky is right. Steve knows that he shouldn’t have kissed Sharon. It was wrong to lead her on, but Bucky was there watching them and it had felt like old times. He remembered how much Bucky had enjoyed watching him with others. As long as Steve always ended the night in Bucky’s bed, Bucky said that a bit of voyeurism was his favorite kind of foreplay. It also helped to keep up appearances in a time when their relationship was not without risk and discretion was paramount. 

Steve doesn’t answer, but he doesn’t pull away either, so Bucky starts placing feather-light kisses to the exposed column of Steve’s neck. It feels distractingly good and Steve is having a difficult time remembering why he should be stopping this. 

“Do you remember that time in London, Steve? The night that you recruited the Howling Commandos? If I recall correctly, there was a woman involved that time too. It was also the first night we spent together after you’d been _enhanced_.” Bucky punctuates his last word with a squeeze to Steve’s dick, it’s half-hard at this point and the slight friction feels amazing. Steve does his best to stifle the moan that escapes his throat at the feeling of Bucky’s hand, but he’s not completely successful, and he feels Bucky’s answering smile against his neck as he says, “So you do remember…” 

And of course Steve remembers that night. It’s one of the most memorable nights of Steve’s life… 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
~ _A London Pub, 1943…_ ~

“See? I told you… they’re all idiots.” Bucky takes a sip of his drink as Steve sits and joins him at the bar. 

“How about you? Are you ready to follow Captain America into the jaws of death?” Steve asks.

“Hell no,” Bucky answers. “That little guy from Brooklyn who was too dumb not to run away from a fight…” Bucky turns to look at Steve. “I’m following him.” Then, almost as an afterthought, “But you’re keeping the outfit, right?” 

Bucky had already informed him, in a hurried whisper on that first walk back to camp after Steve had freed the men from the Hydra base, that he couldn’t wait to rip Steve out of his Captain America uniform – but that was only because he couldn’t wait to see Steve naked now that his body had changed. Steve knew Bucky well enough to know that he would love him and want him regardless of his size and muscle mass, but he didn’t blame the man for wanting to see what Steve’s new body could do… Steve wanted that as well. His increased strength and endurance (not to mention the fact that the serum really had enhanced _every_ part of his body) was going to translate into spectacular new experiences in the bedroom, Steve was sure of it. 

“You know what? It’s kind of growing on me,” says Steve.

At that point, Peggy enters the pub looking ravishing and the noise level in the place plummets. She only has eyes for Steve though as she asks him about meeting Stark the next day and then she ignores Bucky in favor of hinting heavily that she would be interested in starting up something with Steve as soon as the opportunity presents itself. 

He doesn’t discourage her for several reasons. For one, he wouldn’t mind going dancing with a socially acceptable and enthusiastic partner for once. Also, he really does like Peggy for herself. She’s smart and beautiful, and she could probably kill him without chipping her nail polish – Steve respects that in a woman and a friend. And lastly, he knows that flirting with Peggy will really get Bucky going. Not that he really needs any spurring on at this point, but this is the first night that he and Bucky will be able to sneak off and be together for the whole night without anyone missing them and coming to look for them. The anticipation is making him a bit giddy and he knows that riling Bucky up can only lead to good things later on. 

After Peggy leaves and he exchanges a few more words with his friend, Bucky excuses himself to go to the john and Steve makes his excuses to the rest of the newly formed Howling Commandos. He goes to the bar to lay down some money for the boys’ open tab and bids them a “Good night,” before slipping out of the pub through a half-hidden side door which leads out to a deserted alley. 

As soon as the door swings closed behind him, Steve finds himself shoved up against the stone wall of the pub, strong hands grabbing him about the waist and insistent lips placing heated kisses on his neck. “What took you so long?” Steve can smell the whiskey on Bucky’s breath, and even though he can’t get drunk himself, Steve feels like he’s becoming intoxicated from the smoky aroma. 

Though, that may have more to do with the excitable brunette who’s now placed one leg in between Steve’s own and is grabbing his ass as he pulls their hips together. He can feel Bucky’s erection pressed insistently against his thigh and he lets out an unabashed moan as he feels his own hardened length rubbing into Bucky’s groin. He’s starting to get lost in the moment, coherency flying swiftly out of the proverbial window, and he suddenly remembers that this probably isn’t the best place for what they’re doing. 

“Buck… Bucky, stop! We can’t do this here.” He grabs Bucky’s head in his two hands and looks the man in the eyes – they’re glassy and hooded, and so dark as to almost appear black in the dim light of the alley. “Come on… there’s an inn not too far from here, as long as we’re back in time tomorrow morning, no one should come looking for us.” 

Bucky nods and places one last heated kiss to Steve’s lips before pulling away suddenly and heading for the mouth of the alley. When they reach the street, Steve leads the way. He stops a ways down from the inn and turns to face his friend. “Ok, I’ll go in a book a room. Then I’ll meet you by the side door. Give me about ten minutes, alright?” Bucky nods again and then winks, a lopsided grin on his handsome face, before turning to look into the shop window that they’ve stopped in front of. To anyone watching it would appear as if he’s just window shopping. 

Steve enters the inn and acquires one room for the night. He begins to head up the staircase but stealthily backtracks toward the dining room and kitchen area when the front desk attendant turns his back. The eatery is abandoned at this time of night so it’s easy enough to slip into the (also empty) kitchen and find the door which leads to the alley. He lets Bucky in and tells him the room number. They agree that Steve will head up first, allowing Bucky to follow behind in a few minutes. The secrecy and sneaking around is annoying but it’s a practiced maneuver that the two have perfected over the course of their relationship. It simply wouldn’t do to have anyone suspect them of being together, not like this, especially now that Steve’s so well known. 

Five minutes later, Steve is in the room and he hears a soft knock on the door. He lets Bucky in and once again he finds himself accosted by a horny soldier, this time though, he’s giving back as good as he’s getting. He meets Bucky kiss for kiss, and wastes no time in divesting his friend of his jacket before working on the buttons of his shirt. 

Bucky’s hands are doing the same to him and they haven’t stopped kissing, so it’s a bit awkward and they start laughing as their arms get tangled and Bucky accidentally knocks Steve’s hand so that he smacks himself under the jaw. Steve grasps Bucky’s hands in his own to stop their movement and says, “Why don’t we work on our own clothes, huh?” 

Bucky’s answering smirk sends a tingle down Steve’s spine -- _This is going to be good…_ he thinks, _This is going to be so good_. Then they’re each working on their own uniforms, though they’re looking at each other, heated expressions adding fuel to the already blazing fire of excitement burning away in Steve’s chest. 

By the time Bucky is completely naked, Steve is still in his trousers and boxer shorts. He places his fingers on the button of his pants but Bucky knocks his hands away. He starts placing open-mouthed kisses to Steve’s muscular chest while he works at unfastening Steve’s pants. 

Soon enough they’re open and Bucky starts to work them down over Steve’s ass, taking the boxer shorts with as he goes. He kisses a trail down Steve’s torso, finally ending up on his knees, his face directly in front of Steve’s cock, now freed from confinement. 

“Jesus, Steve…” Bucky rests his forehead against Steve’s hip to give himself a moment to regain even a bit of composure. Then he looks back at Steve’s cock, glancing up at his face before saying, “You’re so… _big_ …”

Steve blushes and self-consciously places a hand to the back of his neck. “I’m sorry…”

“Hey, don’t apologize.” Bucky takes his right hand and grips the base of Steve’s endowment. He strokes his hand up the generous length, eliciting a pleased groan from Steve. “It’s just going to take a little bit of getting used to.” Bucky leans forward and mouths at the base of Steve’s cock, bringing his other hand up to caress Steve’s balls. Steve widens his stance a couple of inches, tips his head back, and closes his eyes, enjoying the attentions of Bucky’s soft mouth and clever hands. “I wonder if you taste different, too?”

Steve looks down just in time to see Bucky lick the head of his cock and then take it into his mouth, sucking gently and swirling his tongue around a couple of times. Steve’s knees wobble a little bit at the exquisite sensation so he tangles his fingers in Bucky’s hair to steady himself. Bucky grips Steve’s hip with his left hand while his right continues to stroke Steve’s dick. He pulls off long enough to say, “It tastes even better, gorgeous,” and then he goes right back to it – sucking Steve down carefully, lovingly, like they have all the time in the world. 

The slow build is perfect, Bucky gradually increasing how much of Steve he takes into his mouth, giving an encouraging hum when Steve begins to shallowly thrust forward. Steve runs his fingers through Bucky’s brown locks, watching with rapt attention how his dick disappears into that skillful mouth, only to emerge again, shiny with spit and stiff with engorgement. It’s such a beautiful sight that Steve just has to say something – they usually try to stay pretty quiet when they’re together, you never know who might be listening on the other side of doors or walls. 

“Oh _Bucky_ … your mouth is heavenly. _Mmm… _so perfect, baby.” The sensation that Steve feels from Bucky’s answering moan makes Steve moan as well. He lets Bucky continue for a few more minutes. He could probably stand here and enjoy this all night but Steve looks down and he can see Bucky’s erection, it’s completely hard and leaking steadily, so he takes pity on the poor man and pushes his head back gently before pulling him to his feet.__

__Steve starts to kiss him and tries to guide them toward the bed, but Bucky breaks the kiss and holds up one finger. “Just a minute.” He rushes over to where his jacket is in a pile on the floor. He picks it up and reaches into the pocket, pulling out a small pot of Vaseline and brandishing it triumphantly._ _

__“So you weren’t just window-shopping after all?” Steve smiles at his friend’s enthusiasm as the man rushes back over to him to resume their passionate kissing. When they finally reach the bed, Steve lays down on his back and spreads his legs, indicating that he’s ready for Bucky to begin opening him up – like he’s done so many times before._ _

__But instead of joining Steve on the bed, Bucky hesitates, twisting the small pot around in his hands as he looks at Steve speculatively. “What’s the matter, Buck?” Steve asks, a confused look on his face._ _

__“Nothing’s the matter, Steve. It’s just…” He shifts his gaze down to his feet and Steve sits up and scoots down to the end of the bed, rubbing his hands up and down Bucky’s sides as he waits for his friend to continue. “It’s just that I’ve been thinking.” Steve tries to catch his eye so that he knows it’s ok to go on. “I’ve been thinking that I want to try it the other way around.” He’s definitely got Steve’s attention now. “I’ve always been the one doing most of the work, you know what I mean…” Steve does know what he means – Bucky had always been the one to make love to him, because with all of Steve’s health problems they were worried that too much exertion could harm him. But now, without that concern hanging over their heads, it seems that Bucky wants to change things up. And Steve can definitely get on board for that train of thought._ _

__“Hey, Bucky, it’s ok. I know what you mean, and I know what you’re asking.” He stands up and kisses Bucky while turning the man around and pushing him gently down onto the bed. He takes the container from Bucky’s hand and sets it aside for the moment, choosing instead to run his hands up the inside of Bucky’s thighs before bending his head down to trail kisses up the path that his hands had just taken._ _

__Steve takes his time because he wants to do this right. Bucky has always been the one to take care of him. In back alleys and bedrooms, Steve has always felt loved and cared for by this man who consistently puts Steve’s safety and desires above his own. So tonight Steve is determined to show Bucky that that care and devotion is appreciated and reciprocated._ _

__“Anything you want, Bucky. Whatever you want, just ask and I’ll give it to you.” Bucky pulls him up so that their bodies are flush together. He holds Steve close and kisses him for all he’s worth before pulling away to look Steve in the eye._ _

__“You, Steve… I want all of you. I want everything…” Steve leans back down and kisses Bucky again. He uses one hand to support his weight, while the other smooths up and down Bucky’s body, trying to calm the slight tremors that are running through his friend. Some of it might be apprehension but Steve’s pretty sure that it’s mostly anticipation so he leaves Bucky’s mouth to instead trail kisses down his throat and over his chest, pausing to linger over his nipples._ _

__He laves over one small bud, sucking gently before grazing lightly with his teeth. Bucky’s response is positive, to say the least, the loud moan and arching of his chest encourages Steve to focus his attention. He replaces his mouth with his fingers, pinching hard while his mouth moves over to give similar attention to the other side._ _

__Bucky starts rutting his leaking cock against Steve’s stomach which reminds Steve that there’s a lot more that he wants to do, so he releases Bucky’s chest in favor of continuing down his torso. He bypasses Bucky’s cock, which earns Steve a frustrated groan from the writhing body below him, and he keeps up his path of wet, sucking kisses until he reaches Bucky’s ass._ _

__Steve pushes Bucky’s thighs further apart to expose his hole, causing a rush of excitement to flow through Steve. He’s been on the receiving end of this kind of attention more times than he can count, but it’s going to be the first time that he’s the one doing the giving, the first time that he’ll be the one to control the situation, and he can’t wait. And the fact that Bucky trusts him to do this makes Steve want to make this the best night of Bucky’s life, a night that the two of them will always remember._ _

__Steve begins with a few tentative licks, holding Bucky’s cheeks apart and massaging slightly. The soft noises Bucky is making encourages Steve to be a bit more bold so he lets the tip of his tongue slip past his rim, thrusting shallowly at first, but going deeper with each pass. He takes a moment to suck on the sensitive flesh which causes Bucky to gasp and tightly fist his hands into the bed sheets._ _

__Steve spends a few more minutes licking and sucking and thrusting his tongue into Bucky. He then pulls back so that he can grab the little pot of lubricant, but before he does, he licks up the length of Bucky’s dick and then pulls the head into his mouth, drinking in the pooling precome that’s gathered at the tip. He pulls off after only a moment, just a tease really, and Bucky shoots him an annoyed look which Steve just smiles at._ _

__Bucky’s look of annoyance is gone soon enough though when Steve starts to smooth two slick fingers over Bucky’s exposed entrance. He lets one finger slip inside, caressing the tight grip of his inner walls. One finger soon becomes two and while the fit is tight, Steve can tell that Bucky doesn’t mind – he’s panting a bit but he’s moaning and thrusting his hips in an undulating fashion, all while using his own hands to pinch and tug at his nipples._ _

__Steve leans over and takes Bucky’s cock into his mouth again, this time sticking around to bob his head up and down the hard length. Bucky moves one hand to tangle his fingers in Steve’s blonde hair and looks down at him. “ _Steve_ … so good…” Steve continues to suck him down, adding a third finger which has Bucky dropping his head back down to the pillow. _ _

__A few more minutes of Steve thrusting three thick fingers in and out of Bucky’s slick, tight hole finds the man’s moans getting louder, interspersed with small words of encouragement and enjoyment. “Yes! _Steve_ … oh, that feels so good, gorgeous.” Bucky’s words send a pleasant tingle down Steve spine, landing in his groin and causing his already achingly hard dick to throb in anticipation. Then Bucky says something that takes over Steve’s brain, causing the super soldier to groan and hide his face in Bucky’s stomach. _ _

__“Please, Steve… _please_. I need it…I need _you_.” Steve has never heard Bucky beg like that. He sometimes likes to tease Steve, refusing to make him come until Steve is a sweating, panting, begging mess. Steve’s never been the one to cause the begging though and he finds that it’s simply intoxicating. He thinks it just might be his new favorite thing so he musters up the wherewithal to step up to this new role. _ _

__He keeps fucking Bucky with his fingers but he moves his body up the bed and sucks on one of his nipples, hard like Bucky seems to like it. “What do you need, Buck? Hm? Tell me, baby.”_ _

__Bucky hisses and arches his back when Steve returns his mouth to his chest, this time using his teeth to nip at the sensitive bud. “You, Steve… I-I need you to fuck me. I’ve wanted this for so long… _please_ …” Steve groans again but doesn’t waste any more time, pulling out his fingers and reaching to swipe a clean one through the goopy stuff in the little pot. _ _

__“Alright, baby. I’ve got you. I’ll give you what you need.” He spreads the fresh lubricant around his heated cock and lines himself up. He presses in until his head is completely engulfed and then leans down to kiss Bucky while he pushes the rest of the way in. The feeling is exquisite. He’s had hands and mouths around him before but this is different – this is a revelation. He doesn’t know if it’s the changes to his body caused by the serum, but he suspects it’s mostly just that Bucky feels that good. He can’t believe that they’ve never done it this way before. And he’s pretty sure that Bucky is thinking the same thing. The man looks completely gone – his eyes are hooded and glassy, one hand is tangled in his own hair, and his cock is still rock hard and leaking – he’s the perfect example of wanton and debauched, and Steve just can’t get enough._ _

__“Look at you,” he whispers. He takes a moment to kiss Bucky, using his new position of power to dominate the kiss with teeth and tongue. Then he pulls back and props himself up on his hands while he continues to thrust. “Do you like this, Bucky?” Bucky continues to moan and nods and Steve takes that as encouragement to keep talking. “Do you like when I fuck you like this? Hm? Say it, Bucky.”_ _

__“Yes! Yes, I like it. I love it when you fuck me! Please, Steve… _please_ … fuck me harder! It feels _so_ good…” Steve obliges – he sits back on his heels and hooks his arms under the back of Bucky’s knees, grasping his thighs and thrusting forward hard. “Yes… yes… yes… fuck me, Steve!” _ _

__They’ve never been much for yelling, or even talking very much, during sex. They know that they need to keep their relationship secret, and shouting loudly during sex is not the way to achieve that. But Steve can’t find it in him to care right now. Bucky’s words are spurring him on so much that he doesn’t think anything could make him stop now. He doesn’t know what’s better – the delicious squeeze of Bucky’s tight hole around him, or the obvious pleasure and enjoyment that his friend is feeling as well. He can tell that Bucky is getting close, and he is too. He thinks if he does this right, he might be able to make them both come at the same time._ _

__He lowers Bucky’s legs back to the bed, widens his knees a bit, and uses one hand to prop himself above Bucky’s torso. He slows his thrusts but makes them more targeted, trying to aim for Bucky’s prostate. He thinks he’s found it when Bucky throws his head back and shouts, “Yes! There! Right there! _Fuck_ … you’re gonna make me come…”_ _

__“Yeah? You gonna come, baby?” Steve can feel his dick gain that last bit of rigidity, the surefire sign that he’s about to come too, so he quickly licks his palm and reaches down to grab Bucky’s cock. He jacks him with tight, fast strokes as he continues to drill his prostate. “Come on, baby… I want you to come now.” Bucky complies, shooting his load all over Steve’s hand and up onto his chest and stomach. “That’s it, baby… just like tha- _ohhh, yes… Bucky…_ ” Steve concentrates enough to keep himself from collapsing onto Bucky as he comes. Bucky is squirming his hips to help work Steve through it and the rush Steve feels is indescribable. _ _

__Steve feels Bucky’s hand come up and cradle the side of his cheek so he turns his attention to his friend’s face. “Why have we never done that before?” Bucky asks, and Steve just smiles and shakes his head slightly._ _

__“You know why. But now though, I hope that we’ll do that a lot more in the future.” Steve lets himself slip free of Bucky’s body and moves to lie down beside him._ _

__“The future? Hell, I say we do it again now!” Steve chuckles and turns his face up to Bucky’s. They share a tender kiss and then Steve leans back and cups Bucky’s face in his hand, rubbing his thumb over his cheek and looking him lovingly in his beautiful grey-blue eyes._ _

__“I’m so happy to have you back, Buck. I don’t know what I’d do if I really lost you.” Bucky’s eyes soften as they hold each other’s gaze. “I love you, you know.”_ _

__“I know… I love you too.” Bucky sighs and pulls Steve close, nuzzling his blonde hair as Steve snuggles into his chest. “You don’t have to worry about any of that though. You know that I’m with you to the end of the line.”_ _

__Steve smiles at the familiar phrase. He knows that it’s just words – with the war and everything, there’s no telling what could happen to either one of them. But it’s reassuring just the same. Bucky has always been there for Steve – he trusts his friend to do whatever he can to keep his promises. For once he just lets himself pretend that everything will be ok. Maybe Bucky’s right, maybe they’ll both make it out of this together. It’s a nice thought, and for tonight at least Steve can look on the positive side of things._ _

__Bucky is safe and sound in Steve’s bed. They love each other and they’ve got all night to show one another just how much. Steve turns his head up again and begins to kiss Bucky’s neck, running his hand down to begin stroking him back to full hardness once more._ _

__“Mmm… I like how you think, gorgeous,” says Bucky._ _

__They spend the rest of the night making love, knowing that this will be the last time for a long time before they’ll be able to be alone quite like this again. Sometimes it’s fast and dirty, other times it’s slow and sweet, but every time it’s love and passion, all culminating in a night that they won’t ever forget._ _

__\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_ _

__It’s so easy to get caught up in the memory of that night. Bucky is here again, with his arms around him and his lips on Steve’s heated skin. It would be the easiest thing in the world to just turn around and give in – to pretend, like that night, that everything will be ok just as long as they’re together._ _

__But it’s not that simple anymore. There’s Tony to think about now, and as much as Steve doesn’t like to think about it – there’s Bucky’s past as well. Steve doesn’t blame him for anything that he did while under Hydra’s control but that doesn’t change the fact that it has affected his friend in ways that he can’t even begin to imagine. Not to mention that right now they’re on their way to attempt to stop a dangerous criminal from setting loose a group of evil super soldiers on the world. This just isn’t the time or place for sexual reunions._ _

__So instead he takes hold of Bucky’s hand and turns to face the man, grasping his other hand as well – the metal surprisingly warm under his touch. “Bucky, we just can’t. Not right now at least. There are things that we need to discuss… things that I haven’t told you yet, and now is not the appropriate time for that conversation.”_ _

__Bucky smiles weakly and rubs circles into the skin of Steve’s hands. “Soon, though?”_ _

__“Yeah. Soon.” At Steve’s assurance, Bucky gives his hands one last squeeze and then returns to his seat in the cockpit, Steve following and sitting down as well. He looks over to his friend like before and Bucky is steadily gazing back, less concern this time, more affection on his handsome face. Steve would give anything not to feel so conflicted right now._ _

__He suddenly wishes that Dean were here with him. He had felt so completely comfortable with the Hunter. He felt that he could share his most close-kept secrets with the man and that instead of any judgment he’d just get understanding and good advice. The no-strings-attached sex had been nice too, but that’s not something that he needs to be thinking about. He’s got enough romantic entanglements on his plate right now. Besides, Dean is gone – back to his universe to live happily ever after with his angel, presumably, and never again to see Steve._ _

__So Steve just has to suck it up and deal with his own problems. Well, maybe later… for now he’s just going to pretend that his problems don’t exist and deal with the crisis on hand. Maybe if he just ignores the longing in his chest for both of the beautiful brunettes, then everything will just work itself out… right?_ _


End file.
